Men and Porn

Continuing our discussion on the taboo topics, we,this month, present to you the dark side of male psychology. The side which should have been 'accepted' by the society(considering that every male was or IS associated with it) but is still a BIG NO-NO.

Its our association with PORN.

In case you are a Guy you probably would have never thought of the association. Like Why it happened? (Though u will exactly remember as to when and how it happened) Is it right or wrong? and so on...These are the questions which u wont think to urself.Cuz to guys,to us, this is something that nature teaches us. It is something that comes naturally to us, something that we have evolved upon...Just like walking, just like driving a car, Just like riding a bike. We have had our falls(pun intended) but we have learned and we have gone from strength to strength ;).

So why exactly are men so inclined towards porn?

At its most basic level, pornography answers natural human curiosity. Adolescent boys want to know what sex is about, and porn certainly demonstrates the mechanics. Curiosity?!?!?!? And that too only in guys ??? My female friends would surely love to ask me as to what makes guys or boys so curious.


Well first of all the physical changes that happen make us curious. Now these changes happen for both the sexes but unlike girls we dont have anybody who can walk us through that phase. If i have to put it on the table, I would say that Girls are 'taught' as to how to use a sanitary napkin but nobody tells a guy as to what happens to his willy when he gets up in the morning. There you go!!! I said it!!!!! We dont have no friends when it comes to adoloscence.

Another thing that drive boys towards Porn is the stiff competition. Its a world known fact that boys are treated more harshly than their female counterparts .The competition is always a double edged sword. It kills everyone. As a young boy you dont care which school you study in or whats your rank in class. All you want is to do your homework and then go play with your friends, Make dungeons in Sand piles, Tie a thread to a grasshoper or play with the stray dog of your street.

But the society wants us to push the envelope.Always. You top your class, next thing you father will want from you is you to come first in your colony and who knows maybe district or country someday. Its an insatiable hunger. I dont think girls go through the same ordeal.

If you do well in studies, you will probably be sent to some boarding school, away from your childhood friends, away from all the things u love. Away to Loneliness. Even if you are an average kid you will be asked to concentrate on your studies.Your playtime will be cut, your social interaction will be none, except for the family functions or marriages. They will drive you to Loneliness.

So my point here is that boys are driven to use porn through loneliness.Loneliness because of being away from home or Loneliness because of questioning/conditional acceptance.

Like many men, I first saw pornography during puberty. And as ive told you, i still remember those days. The days of going to the local video parlour and asking for a porn movie.It was just what you did. It was cool, naughty and everyone was doing it.Ask a guy and he will tell you how much of planning and effort goes into going to a video parlour and renting a porn movie. Watching a porn movie wasnt less than cracking a puzzle. We,guys, had to tc of lot of permutations and combinations. Back in the day VCR's were considered to a luxury item, not everyone could afford them. so we had to list all the friends who had VCR's. Rule out all those who lived in joint families. Then for the ones living in nuclear families we picked those who had both their parents working.

And if that wasnt enough, our next task normally was to goto a parlour and not only ask for it but also hide that huge bulky cassette somewhere in our pockets or sometimes in our undies.Now different places have different naming conventions. At some places its called "BF"(nick named from Blue Film, i still wonder about the association of color BLUE with a porn movie..maybe it was used to make your BLUES go away...i donno), some called it "masala", some called it pondi, some called it "saamann" , we @ our place called it "kheera"(as cucumber..we have a punju phrase that talks about it..ask me and i will tell you).

It was fun, it was adventure. Its our first tyrst with authority. Its something that WE control. Nobody tells us what to do or how to do. Nobody evaluates our performance. I guess thats the thing guys love about Porn. Its a world where noone challenges your authority. Its a world in which every woman is your willing and grateful servant. I know sounds gross but hey you cant expect more from a 13-14 year old, Can you????

We love it, get hooked on to it, some even get obsessed but it but then we evolve. Cuz we realize that porn is fantasy world. Its a lie. It peddles falsehoods about men, women and human relationships. It teaches us lots of untruths. The primary being that "women are always available". It is something that you have to unlearn and the sooner you do it, the faster will be your transition to reality. But 13 or 30 we all watch it.

I would sum this up by saying that we, men, dont want porn cuz we like or desire the women in the movie. We dont want it cuz we arent getting enough from you. We watch to get it off.