Read On!!!

As a preface, if the following jumble of words sound like a SUNDAY TIMES or HYDERABAD TIMES article, it is purely coincidental. But again, this is not a work of fiction. This quantum of knowledge was acquired through generations of male survivors who have gone through these five stages we mentioned before. Some of them cracked the code, came out with flying colors and even enjoyed each of those phases. Some of them never returned.(Scary!!!)
This is a list of DO's and DONT's that could help you in your way. Again, this is a list that gets updated on a daily basis. The authors don't guarantee any results because it depends on how the individual implements these time tested formulae (You can work with that peanut sized thing above your medulla oblongata called 'The Brain' or you can be a jackass). So the Fountain of Knowledge speaks thus:

DO:
1. then revel in your own world, being single, unlimited porn movies, spiritual freedom, financial freedom and what not,if you don't want to get involved with all those complicated things (“Bouncers” in layman term).
2.Switch to TATA Indicom, they provide this scheme where you can select a favorite number and you can talk non-stop on your mobile on....hmmm.....anything. Also the mobile comes with preset text messages like “What are you doing?”, “I am in a Meeting”,”LOL” (yeah! Sometimes you are supposed to laugh), “I am having a bad day” et al.
3.Understand that you are talking to a girl, not just another human being. Treat em royally. (Moral: You need to be a good pacifier).
4.Not say it straightforward, if you are really serious. If you do, you are losing the magic. It's always advisable to twist it ,but you are supposed to know what you just told.
5.Not think about the lost chance that you had when the cute girl in your school had crush on you and you acted like you always do and ruined the whole thing up. Everyone have their “Lost chances”. Be proud of it.
6.You still think there is anything sensible being discussed here?


DON'T:
1.Think that any of the following is going to help you. We are all men. Fallible.
2.Judge the book by it's cover, but it certainly helps.
3.Think about a girl who is writing CAT(For beginners, it is the exam that you have to pass to get into IIMs. This is where you meet your office colleague, just next to you and realize that whenever he said he wanted to go 'Meet his/her friends', they were actually attending a coaching class), especially if you are writing the same exam. If you don't know what I am trying to say here, talk to me.
4.Ever ….. ever ….ever...try the “Chinaman move”.
5.Be selfish. Sometimes, it helps.
6.You think you should stop reading this crap?

At the end of it all, there is nothing to learn here. If things are supposed to happen, it happens. Just enjoy the ride. You die only once.